Two Beans in the Oven

Well, our transfer is complete and as of Saturday morning we have two little beans hanging out in the oven.

I must admit, there were several surprises in store for us this weekend. Somehow we had convinced ourselves that we were going to have a five day transfer, so we were in a pretty relaxed mood on Saturday morning. We were supposed to call in at 8:3o to see if we were on for Saturday or Monday, but much to our surprise the phone rang at 8:28. It was one of the nurses telling Mrs. Beans to go pee, pop a Valium, start drinking water, and get to the office by 9:30 for a 10:00 transfer.

Mind you, we had convinced ourselves that we were going to have a 5 day transfer, so we morning preparations consisted of laying in bed eating cinnamon rolls and watching DVDs.

Holy Shit! Thank god for the Valium because it was a not a low stress morning. We showered up, threw on some clothes, and raced to the clinic (all the while Mrs. Beans was downing her 32 oz. of liquid). We breathlessly arrived at the office at 9:33, but of course we were just told to take a seat.

10 o'clock came and went and we didn't hear a single word for any of the staff. All the while, Mrs. Beans is becoming increasingly uncomfortable because she is not allowed to use the facilities. She is on the verge of breaking down and heading to the can, when one of the nurses comes to get us at 10:10. I tell the nurse how uncomfortable Mrs. Beans is and point out that they are running late (despite the fact that we are the only ones there), but the nurse encourages her to hold on for just a bit longer because they are going to start any minute.

At this point Mrs. Beans is starting to actually sweat as a result of the effort that it is taking to "hold it." I put on the haz-mat suit that they use to make husbands feel important and we are ready to go, but still no doctor and still no embryologist. Finally, at 10:25, Mrs. Beans cannot take it anymore and she has to use that bathroom. The nurse, who now is being very sympathetic and has placed a threatening phone call to the doctor, tells Mrs. Beans to do a "five-count" pee. I had never really thought about this, but it is much harder for women to "hold it," than for men. After all, there is not really an "it" that you can hold to keep it in. But I digress. Mrs. Beans relieved herself (she later told me that she did a "10 count") and the doctor finally arrived.

We immediately went into the room and the embryologist joined us. They said that of the five remaining embryos, one had arrested at 3 cells, two were at 6 cells and needed further development, and that we had two 8 cell, grade A embies that they were going to transfer today. Now this was not exactly the consult that was described in the literature. So, much to their chagrin, I actually stopped them.

"Wait a minute, you have been telling us all along that one was the preferred number to transfer for someone under the age of 35. Is there something wrong with the embryos?"

"No, no, we generally transfer one on a five day transfer, because we have a better idea of the viability of a blastocyst. Since you are down to two embryos, we don't want to wait for the 5 day and we want to put them in right away."

All of this was fine, but it certainly came as a surprise to the both of us. We have basically memorized the IVF literature at our clinic and can quote sections chapter and verse. "And on the 3rd day, thou shall not transfer more that two embryos into a patient under the age of 35! Can I get an Amen!?!? Hallelujah!"

Anyway, they showed us the pictures of the embryos (I am calling them Mary-Kate and Ashley), and prepared Mrs. Beans. The doctor was brazen enough to comment, "my your bladder certainly is full!" Yeah, no kidding?

So, Mrs. Beans was pretty focused on not peeing in the doctor's face, but I got to witness the transfer and it was pretty awesome. There was a little flash and you could see them (or at least some small bubbles) being shot into the uterus (And that Tommy is how babies are made!).

We were obviously the only couple with a procedure that morning, as the nurse gave us our final instructions and asked us if we knew the way out!?!?

Umm, yeah, do you want us to get the lights and log off the computers too?

Anyway, we came home and all of a sudden the Valium kicked in (better late than never), so Mrs. Beans took a brisk 6 hour nap! She refused to be roused, even when I came into the room to inform her that J.K. Rowling announced that Dumbledore is gay. Under normal circumstances she would have shot out of bed at such explosive news, but on Saturday she simply said, "Howzistisns.... snooort... hasdsdu... gay?" and rolled back over.

The rest of the weekend was spent trying to convince Mary-Kate and Ashley to attach ASAP. My sister brought over a wide variety of magazines for Mrs. Beans, some friends made some homemade soup, I whipped up a batch of homemade meatballs, and my SIL and BIL brought over some fantastic Indian food on Sunday. Hopefully, plying them with gifts and home cooked meals will do the trick. So that's were we are at for the moment. The pregnancy test is set for November 3rd which seems impossibly far away, so we are trying to stay busy. Thanks for all of your positive thoughts! They really do make a difference!